I have been working too hard and its now time to grab me some fun. Now I am no social butterfly but I do love a boogie and to strut my stuff. Hmm time to “doll” myself up, slap on some war paint and hit that dance floor. Tonight is the night to flirt, get my sexy back and remember I am a EVERY woman as Chaka Khan tells us
(??).
Straight hair, curls, up or down? Cleavage or respectable, heels or comfort? All of these decisions have to be congruent with my mood of attention seeking. Hmmm its definitely time to flaunt what God gave this girl!! Time to bring out the big guns..yep its time for the stretch jeans(sprayed on as my dad would say) daring neckline and heels.
Having created my ensemble I take a glance in the mirror and ask myself “Does my butt look big in this?” My delighted response is “hell yeah”!! Now some of you may be confused at this point and wondering why I might be delighted… well for me this is indeed my biggest ASSet!.
This asset has followed me around all my life and has been subjected to taunting and laughter at high school, being pointed out in night clubs saying damn have you seen the size of that girls butt!! Now taking into consideration that this was in the pre J-Lo and Kardashian era this was quite devastating for a teenager to hear. But this girl could dance!! and she made the most of the exaggeration of her curves whilst on the dance floor but once in the street the big booty was duly covered up in baggy tracksuits and long languid tops that could double as tents.
As I also developed other curves that refused to stay inwards popping out like the Incredible Hulks muscles I invested more in my camouflage. In my 30s it was official I definitely had left behind my “skinny” days of my teenage years. I guess the good news was that maybe my booty didn’t look so big if the rest of me had grown??
I was to find out otherwise as I travelled to the Caribbean. Black women have extremely high levels of body image acceptance, they own their curves their lady lumps and everything that shows that they are a woman. Being “bootyliscious” is something to be envied with some girls in Jamaica actually injecting “chicken growth hormones” into their behinds to get what God has gifted me. The comments of “Damnn check out that girls butt! were no longer hurled offensively but as an offer of appreciation given by both men and women. I spent time in the Caribbean learning how to appreciate being a real woman and to love my curves.
I returned with a renewed sense of self, out went the tents and in came the jeggings, the fitted tops and the heels that showed off the butt, thighs and calves and up went my self esteem.
I may not be the typical image of attractive that the british press would serve up… being short and having obvious bits that go in and out at will …but im telling you this… I am in my 50th year and have never felt so damn hot!!!
Fall in love with who you are because you are never going to be anyone else!!!
Articles that TJ writes for The Love Coach cover all steps in the cycle of love and include tips and advice for many dating or relationship issues. Her experience as a Love Therapist, Love Coach and Life Coach bring a real-life approach to everyday situations.
Remember life is for loving – that includes yourself!
FOUNDER & PRIMARY THERAPIST
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